Suman Rizvi November 12 at 11:37pm
so i was stalking you and reading your live journal posts.
and all of a sudden i became really interested and wanting to know how your pregnancy trip was. and how the birth part of it was.
also, which online surveys do u do for money?
i'm currently out of a job.
miss you tons chicka.
hope you , your baby, and your bf are doing good :)


Ryan Dattoli November 12 at 10:16pm
hmm how was the pregnancy trip?

what like the whole being preggo thing. it was alright. and it was shitty. i was a fatty and it was hard to breathe and my tummy felt like it was eating its self and it was hard to poop! looking back at it it was enjoyable i guess but being it felt endless and crazy and wtf was i thinking!!!

or do u mean when they gave me those drugs ...stateol? or what ever when i was in labor? cuz that was a crazy trip! if i wasnt in pain, not that i cared cuz i was FUCKED up. it would have been a good trip. it was all full of hospital items all twerly kinda out of body dreamy like. it was weird. then i woke up and they gave me the epidural and then i had a baby. my room was full of so many motherfuckers, not like family but for the baby we thoiught he might have hemophilia so like all these nurses and different teams of dr's were there just in case. and then he poped out. i didnt push for that long. maybe 10 times? i dono i was fucked up! i just remember the lighs were rly bright in my eyes and i just concentrated on pushing. i dono that it hurt but it was uncomfortable and it was the worst when the babys sholders where comming out. and it was such a releif when he was finally out. they took him and weighed him and grady cut the cord. and then she went to sew me up i guess i ripped. i ripped 3 times!! once down the bottom of my vage but not all the way to my ass. and once up each of my lips!! but not alll the way through thank god! dont worry they look normal now! oh and also i was induced so i had to dialate before a certian amount of time or i had to get a c section. and i thought i wasnt gunna make it. but i did that was scary cuz i didnt want a c section. and i had to peeeeeee soooo bad the whole time and i coukdnt get up to go to the bathroom cuz i was connected to all this shit so the nurses had to keep bringing me a bed pan. i was so glad when they gave me the epidural cuz then they put the cathader in and i didnt have to worry about it. it was awesome. any way i didnt want to hold the baby untill i was sewed up. i was kinda in shock and trying not to think about how he could be sick! then we held him for a while then they took him away to do the baby check up thing. and then i was going to be transported to the recovery room. its like ur own lil hotel room it was cool! and the nurse was all u want help to get into this wheel chair and i was all nawh i got this. but i sooo didnt! but i didnt fall so it was all good. and before that when they took the baby away i was soooo hungry so i ate a shit ton of jello and fruit cocktail. but the drugs and the wheel chair made me soooo dizy!right when i got into the recovery bed i barfed all over the place!! it was gross. then i ate some more and felt better and prolly slept

they brought the baby back in and he was all rapped up w his lil hat and shit. he was adorible!! and grady held him and mom held him and such. it was awesome. i miss being in the hosipital. it was so sureal. and the baby was so good he just slept and looks so cute and quiet and awesome. and my mom was there. and you get free food brought to u all the time. and they would bring me perkasetts those pills are amazing
cept they made me hot. but my vage didnt hurt. cuz that shit hurt after! and even after i got outa the hospital it hurt! and the dr perscribed me hydros for at home but that shit dont work! it was sad. and then we had a party at my house w gradys family my family and our friends and it was fun cuz like every ones all making you feel all special and shit!

oh, and online surveys right. give me ur e mail and ill send you an invite. i get money when u join!! and u wont make a living off it! but u will make money and maybe even get free stuff!

also i just dyed my hair and i have a killer headach!

longest fb messg ever !

had muh baby, hes cute:



hes sleeping right now. hes such a good baby. hes only pissed when hes poopin, or if hes super hungry. speaking of super hungry, im starved. now that i dont have a crazy appitite, i forget to eat. Oh, did you know, my little boy doesnt hsve hemophilia. how lucky is that? i mean we had 50/50 odds here.

also, i got a new computer, the other one crapped its self, which was long overdue. its one of those mini laptops. its a bad ass. also it has a web cam. so if any one wants to chat it up?!


also, i cleaned things today, i feel accomplished.

So we have finally decided on a name. good thing too because im so close.


Eligh Alistar LeBlanc

what do you guys think?



also at 4am on the 3rd of june ima go to the hospital to get induced and pop this kid out. did u know todays the 1st!! its so close.

im excited. but scared too. i mean im scared for my vage. and for the baby. mostly the baby, but my poor vagina, and boobs. it hurts thinking about it actually.

my mommys on her way here from az. shes about to be in ft worth. so shes almost here!! and we still have 5 puppies. horrible, little creatures! but my mom will take one back with her so then well have four.
god its been so long since i have updated. i finally got the babies room in order. its pretty damn cute, let me tell ya. but theres so much laundry to do. i thought it was never ending before, now its gunna be crazy! it would be better if the machines werent down stairs.


also, im starving!

oh and theres preggo ryan pics
: click that shit

preggo

a lot has been going on, i dont know why i havent been updating. laziness.

side note: i just found out the dallas does indie podcast is ending in september after 4 years :(

im seven months preggo now.



weird story, Luna, my bf's dog, also pregnant. she shouold have her pups any day now. i hope shell wait till mondayish tho, cuz i dont want her to be alone when shes has them. i kinda wanna be there to make sure she eats the sacks off em, and that their warm enough and such. grady and i are going out of town. he has two shows in austin. one on sat, a privet party w ak1200 and one on tues at plush.

i am sooo hungry. holy shit.

i got make up remover and maskara the other day. now i can make my face pretty and not just look like a fatty cow.

oh also in news. i lost my job. suposedly the kid said i hit him. but i didnt and hes the type of kid that would have said something to me, hes so oppionated and straight forward. I think the mom didnt like me. i mean she is a cop, and i am some knocked up bitch with a shaved head ( i always wore my hair down tho) so i think she made it up so she didnt have to feel bad abt fireing me. sux. so now i have no money. and i only have 25 dollers left. and its getting so close it my due date that its not even worth getting another job. but how will i make money? i do online surveys, they are sending me 24.80 in the mail. but, thats not enough to be an income. shitty.

also, i bought some roving double ended dreads off etsy in december and their still not here and the gal is giving me the run around. ima messg her again today. i really want them and they were semi expensive. wtf. if i dont get them im going to be super pissed off.

also, i want to dye my hair so bad. but the whole being pregnant thing kind of gets in the way.

ima go make food now. im pretty sure im starving.

Its four in the morning. And I'm at work. Sux! Last night grady went to a show where he met the austin guys in real life. And paied one of them back for some records he got. He didn't come home till three we spent abt 10 or 20 min togther. Then I had to go. The bad part tho, was tring to get to sleep w/o him last night. But since on the 4th ill be working a lot more then I won't see him for 3 days straight. It might kill us.


Also on the way here I ran over the deadest skunk. He was just over a hill and I didn't have time to miss him. The car smelled like asshole for miles. And now that I'm in this ladys house I swear sometimes I can still smell it. Its prolly me. I prolly smell of skunk rot. Huray!

i have gotten so many baby things from ambers moms friends and there is more on the way. it makes me happy that people care about other people. i mean i haven't even met these people and their giving me their kids old stuff, not to mention some new things. i feel pretty blessed. i figured my kid would just have to rough it you know. but seriously. i supose she knows all these nice ladys from church. i have actually thought of going to one just to get to know a community of people tp try and get a baby sitting job.

but good thing i dot have to. thats prolly a sin any way. i got a baby sitting job. im going to watch a 4 year old boy names aiden. his moms a cop. i start sunday and work from 4am to 7pm. thats a crap ton of hrs, right. and i thought origionally that i would be making bank. but its only 50 for that day. then in march ima watch him over night from 6pm to 7am the next morning. and ill make 66 dollers a day. i wish it were a little more. but i have no experence, what do i expect. and the lady doesnt even know me. my friend, amber again, recomended me. i could see why the lady, elisa, doenst feel she has to pay me what she would have payed amber. im just glad i got the job. i hope she likes me and i hope her kid likes me. because i mean what a dream job sitting around and playing with a kid all day! and hopefully she will like me and when the baby is born i can bring him with me and watch them both. that would be nice.


hmm what else. grady also got another job. he works at a kiosk in the mall. trying to get people to sell their gold for money. he gets about 8 bucks an hour and also gets commission. i dont think hell get a lot of commission, but 8 an hour is pretty good for a mall job. especially at a kiosk. sux tho, hes one of those guys. they are sooo annoying. piratically the worst part of the mall. their the equivalent of commercials.

So today I went to the dr, she said it wasn't cancer and I wasn't gunna die!

That's good right.

Also, I heard the babys heartbeat again. That's always fun.

Another thing, my moms friend did the numerology on my kid and I was just wondering what this shits based on? You guys believe in that stuff??

http://www.everydayjunglist.org/

my bf has a show every tues from 9 to 10

u can stream it from that site the links on the top right

listen to him spin!

well i didnt finish posting my last post because i had to go to class all of a sudden. things kinda worked out but that day sucked. and now i dont even feel like writing about it anyway.

my bf brought me skittles. so all is forgiven.

also, i got WIC the other day. YAY free cereal for us!

and in other news. my mom called me the other day and said we're switching cell phone companys. i almost cried. i love t mobile and i love my blackberry. what shall i do with out it?

were going to verizon. and i have no idea what phone i want. i could just get another blackberry. they do have them. but i dont want another one i want mine. i think i would miss it too much if i got a phony replacement one. so i think im going to go with an htc phone. the all touch one.




any one know any one else w this phone? is it a piece of shit? i need to know. i mean. most likely it will not be as cool as my berry.

So, today is the first day of class, and it started sucking last night around 12am. Grady has a radio show on tuesdays at 9 on everydayjunglist.org and last night chris came over to drink rum and mix. Its not so much that I hate Chris, it's mostly that I hate Grady when he's around him and his rum. But suprisingly Grady was being really cohearent and nice to me. He must not have been that wasted, or he might have just been extra happy. He got a headlining show in Austin.

Any way, my dad had to use his car today, and Lew was using hers. So Grady and I had to take the same car. This wouldn't be a bad thing if were were remotly going in the same direction. But we weren't. In any case we had to wake up at 6:30 so I could get to school by 8:00 for a lab. Not just any old class, but a lab, you know the ones you can't miss, the ones where after 5 min of class starting they lock the doors. Yeah the ones you can't be late for.

well yesterday was pretty akward. we talked about some things and he was sober, so he wasn't being a complete ass hole. then we didnt realy talk for a few hrs. it was awful. specially since he wouldn't have a ride to houston for who knows how long.

then we both were hungry so i decided getting out of the house might be good for the both of us. and we drove to the bank i cashed some checks. then we went to buffalo wild wings and ate endless wings for a few hrs.it was fun. and so hes staying. i supose the way to a mans heart really is though his stomach. haha later that night he got all wasted on rum and puked them all up. it was sad, but pretty funny. it was the biggest pile of puke ive ever seen. and notice i said pile and not puddle, because it was also the chunkyist thing i have ever seen. still basically chicken, a dog o some animal would be happy as hell to find it. well and also drunk because im sure there was lots of rum in the soppy chickens.

5 months one fight. thats pretty good, right? also, if he thinks he gets any say in the name now he has another thing coming. im already planning my leviathan tattoo.

also, i dont knw what the fuck happened last night. we drove to a friends house to pick up something and on the way back we were suposed to bring it to chris, and then go home. but i got way lost and then we ended up half way home when i checked my map. i ont understand how exactly it happpened i was going the way we came then all of a sudden it was the styx and there werent street lights and such. wtf! but it was kind of an adventure when we turned around we were right infront of this Buddhist temple that i have been too before and gradys into shit like that. if he werent so drunk i would have stoped and we could have looked at it. in the yard its liek 87324782472537 buda statues. not the fat buda, the healthy one. they have swastikas on them, kinda weird i wonder what that symbolises in that culture.

01) Bold what is true about you.
02) Underline what is half true.
03) Italicize what you wish was true about you.
04) Add one true thing about you to the end of the list.
05) Tag five LJ friends.
06) Ask me anything about the bold/italicized/underlined.


• I miss somebody right now.
• I don't watch much TV these days.
• I own lots of books.
• I wear glasses or contact lenses.
• I love to play video games.
• I've tried marijuana.
• I've watched porn movies.
• I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
• I believe honesty is generally the best policy.
• I curse sometimes.
• I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
• I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
• I have broken someone's bones.
• I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
• I hate the rain.
• I'm paranoid at times.
• I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
• I need/want money right now.
• I love sushi.
• I talk really, really fast.
• I have fresh breath in the morning.
• I have long hair.
• I have lost money in Las Vegas.
• I have at least one sibling.
• I was born in a country outside of the U.S.
• I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
• I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
• I like the way that I look.
• I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months.
• I am usually pessimistic.
• I have a lot of mood swings.
• I think prostitution should be legalized.
• I slept with a roommate.
• I have a hidden talent.
• I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
• I have a lot of friends.
• I have kissed someone of the same sex.
• I enjoy talking on the phone.
• I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
• I love to shop and/or window shop.
• I'm obsessed with my Livejournal.
• I don't hate anyone. I dislike them.
• I'm a pretty good dancer.
• I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
• I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
• I've rejected someone before.
• I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
• I want to have children in the future.
• I have changed a diaper before.
• I have a lot to learn.
• I am shy around the opposite sex.
• I'm online 24/7, even as an away message.
• I have at least 5 away messages saved.
• I have tried alcohol or drugs before.
• I have made a move on a friend's significant other or crush in the past.
• I own the "South Park" movie.
• I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on Livejournal.
• I enjoy some country music.
• I would die for my best friend(s).
• I'm obsessive, and often a perfectionist.
• I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
• Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
• I have dated a close friend's ex.
• I am happy at this moment.
• I'm obsessed with guys.
• Democrat.
• Conservative Republican.
• I am punk rockish.
• I go for older guys/girls, not younger.
• I study for tests most of the time.
• I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
• I can work on a car.
• I love my job.
• I am comfortable with who I am right now.
• I have more than just my ears pierced.
• I walk barefoot wherever I can.
• I have jumped off a bridge.
• I love sea turtles.
• I spend ridiculous amounts of money on makeup.
• I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
• I am proficient on a musical instrument.
• I hate office jobs.
• I went to college out of state.
• I am adopted.
• I am a pyro.
• I have thrown up from crying too much.
• I have been intentionally hurt by people that I loved.
• I fall for the worst people and have been hurt every time.
• I adore bright colors.
• I usually like covers better than originals.
• I hate chain theme restaurants like Applebees and TGIFridays.
• I can pick up things with my toes.
• I can't whistle.
• I have ridden/owned a horse.
• I still have every journal I've ever written in.
• I talk in my sleep.
• I've often thought that I was born in the wrong century.
• I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
• I wear a toe ring.
• I have a tattoo.
• I can't stand at LEAST one person that I work with.
• I am a caffeine junkie.
• I am completely tree-huggy spiritual, and I'm not ashamed at all.
• If I knew I would get away with it, I would commit at least one murder.
• I've cosplayed or know what cosplaying is.
• I have been to over 15 conventions.
• I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
• I enjoy a nice glass of wine with dinner.
• I'm an artist. I like to draw.
• I am ambidextrous.
• I sleep with so many stuffed animals, I can hardly fit on my bed.
• If it weren't for having to see other people naked, I'd live in a nudist colony.
• I have terrible teeth.
• I did this meme even though I wasn't tagged by the person who took it before me.
• I have more friends on the internet than in real life.
• I have lived in either three different states or countries.
• I am extremely flexible.
• I want to own my own business.
• I smoke.
• I spend way too much time on the computer.
• Nobody has ever said I'm normal.
• Sad movies, games, fics and the like can cause a trickle of tears every now and then.
• I am proficient in the use of many types of firearms and combat weapons.
• I like the way women look in stylized men's suits.
• I don't like it when people are displeased or seem displeased with me.
• I have been described as a dreamer or likely to have my head up in the clouds.
• I have played strip poker with someone else before.
• I have had emotional problems for which I have sought professional help.
• I believe in ghosts and the paranormal.
• I can't stand being alone.
• I have at least one obsession at any given time.
• I consistently spend way too much money on obsessions-of-the-moment.
• I'm a judgmental asshole.
• I'm a HUGE drama-queen.
• I sometimes wish my father would just disappear.
• I need people to tell me I'm good at something in order to feel that I am.
• I can speak more than one language.
• I can fall asleep even if the whole room is as noisy as it can be.
• I would rather read than watch TV.
• I like reading fact more than fiction.
• I have pulled an all-nighter on an assignment I was given a month to do.
• I have no piercings.
• I have spent the night in a train station or other public place.
• I once spent Christmas completely alone because there was a miscommunication on which parent was supposed to have me that night.
• I've been married and am now divorced.
• There have been times when I have wondered "Why was I born?" and may/may not have cried over it.
• I like most animals better than most people.
• I own a collection of retro games consoles.
• The thought of physical exercise makes me shiver.
• I have hit someone with a dead fish.
• I have written/read erotic stories.
• I am compulsively honest.
• I was born with a congenital birth defect that has never been repaired.
• I have danced topless in front of dozens of complete strangers. And not been ashamed.
• I have gone from wishing I was a girl to reveling in being a boy to feeling like a girl again in the span of five minutes, and not cared a whit for my actual sex.
• I am unashamedly bisexual, and have different motivations for my desires for different genders.
• I sometimes won't sleep a whole night or eat a whole day because I forget to.
• I find it impossible to get to sleep without some kind of music on.
• I dislike milk.
• I obsessively wash my hands.
• I always carry that something significant around with me.
• Sometimes I'd rather wear a wig in day-to-day life than use my own hair.
• I love talking about myself to the point where I need to be stopped.
• I often sing whenever I can.
• I have experienced some type of traumatic abuse in my lifetime.
• I've experienced visions and dreams which I know/believe are from my past life.
• I have déjà vu so vivid that I feel faint.
• I love Harry Potter.
• My parents are not together.
• I don't believe in love.
• I hate people who walk incredibly slowly.
• I have extreme contempt for the vast majority of people.
• Sometimes I don't shower before work.
• To me, procrastination is like a disease!
• I want to sleep now.
• I enjoy watching two guys kissing each other.
• I am a typical Gemini born.
• The more I searched the less I've found.
• As a child I was a huge crybaby.
• I'm feeling alone very fast.
• I always have to spell my (real) name.
• I want to die in my sleep.
• I have a strange laugh.
• If they let me, I can sleep 12 hours in a row.
• I wish I could transform myself into a girl every now and then.
• I dance in the rain and don't feel like a fool.
• I have a favorite stuffed animal that I will not ever get rid of.
• I sing 80's hair metal songs into my hairbrush on a daily basis.
• I have a speech disorder.
• I'm infatuably attracted to men with long, blond, curly hair.
• I sometimes have the urge to take a shot of whiskey or open a can of beer at odd times in the day.
• I have a weakness for guys with nice bodies.
• I plan to move to another country at some point in my life.
• Ever wanted to be a certain fictional character.
• My dreams are so vivid, they feel real.
• I'm a huge geek, the comic-book and video game kind, not the smart kind.
• I can get jealous easily.
• My computer and harddrive are pretty much my most prized possessions.
• I prefer to buy CDs than download music, free or otherwise.
• I haven't had my first kiss yet.
• I have had teeth pulled.
• I listen to music in at least five different languages.
• I think boys/guys/men are icky.
• I prefer dim lights or candlelight to bright lights.
• I fully acknowledge that I love lame jokes, because they're lame.
• I get happy when I buy food on sale.
• I can find beauty and something to love in anything around me.
• Desperate to find where I belong.
• I am a home-owner.
• I more often feel like an outsider than that I belong.
• I'm very spiritual, but not religious at all.
• I've been to 10+ concerts in my life.
• I worry a lot about my future, but at the end of the day, I know I'm going to get everything I'm working for.
• I'd rather be told I'm funny than be told I'm smart.
• I don't actually dress-up to go nowhere, unless I'm supposed to impress someone.
• I prefer savory stuff to sweet stuff.
• I believe that sometimes a picture isn't worth a thousand words, and that writing can mean more than visuals ever will.
• I am incredibly impatient and often times yell at inanimate objects, such as my computer, food, and clothes.
• When forced to name my electronic devices (ipod, Wii, etc.) I use one overall theme (i.e. The Wizard of Oz).
• I would trade almost anything to live in a fictional world of my choosing.
• i feel fat and sassy.

also, i dont really know that many ppl on lj. so fuck the tagging part

i dont really feel like writing anything, i feel very empty. but then again i dont feel like going to sleep either.

hes gunna leave me. he said he doesnt like me and i cant make him like me. and i dont really feel like going into the whole story. i havent slept alone in a whole year. it will be awful going back to an empty bed.

i shouldnt have brought any thing up. i should have just been submissive and gotten over it. then at least hed be next to me right now. but i guess i would have just prolonged something bad. i just wish i hadnt been so stupid, hadnt always been so stupid. what the fuck am i going to do with a kid? well, i guess on the bright side, i get to name him what i want now.


he just came in my room to tell me that zelda sucks....thats really random. i bet hes glad he got the last word or something.

D’artagnan


also a good name. grady doesnt liek it either tho :(

i guess i have 4 months to convence grady he doesnt have a say in what the kids names gunna be. or to convence him he likes it. ill just start refering to the baby as levi and then when he pops out i bet hell answer to it or something.

it will be impossible for grady and i to agree on what to call our little boy. it would figure that we would have the perfect girl name but not have a good boy one.

he wants to name him Grady Brian LeBlanc IV
fuck that. what if in the future we hate eachother? or what if grady goes off and dies?

i want to name him Levi Johnathan LeBlanc so that we can call him Leviathan

i know i know, its the best name ever and i came up with it all by my self. and i dont see why grady gets a say i mean hes already getting his last name. but im thinking he hates my pick, so of course theres a list or random names. here they are:

Hunter
Ethan
Gavin
Blake
Braxton
Corbin
Roland
Renzo


out of the list i like Braxton and he likes Roland. he said Braxton sounds liek a butler name. what does he think that Roland doesnt?


any way what do u kiddies think?

also any sujestions

its a boy

some sort of sea creature omg, just like drugs.